Who to Blame

Who causes your unhappiness? Can you point to someone else or are you responsible? Actually, it’s neither. It’s the thought that things should be other than they are that makes you feel bad. But you aren’t your thoughts. You just use them to design...

The Source of All Problems

The only consistent factor present for every problem you’ve ever had is you. This is not to suggest that you’re to blame for everything you don’t like in your life. But it is relevant information because some of these issues might not be...

Different Shoes

Before you get upset about anything someone says or does, it’s a good idea to make sure you actually understand what’s going on. Jumping to conclusions about their motives rarely works. It’s better to ask them for clarification and listen with an...

The Art of Listening

Hearing and listening aren’t always the same thing. Most of us hear what others say, but really listening with an open mind requires concentration and some degree of self-awareness. What we hear gets interpreted according to our beliefs and expectations and may...

Asleep at the Wheel

Many humans believe that life is happening to them. They think the ability to control their experience is beyond their capacity. While it is true that much is beyond our control, we do have power over the most important factor governing our quality of life: our...

Imperfect Communication

If you’ve ever played the Telephone game, (also called Gossip) you know how humorously and unpredictably messages can morph as they pass from one person to the next. But in the game of life, it isn’t so entertaining when what you intended to communicate...